I should regret this in the morning

Ha ha ,

I'm pretty buzzemm d right now so this will just be rambiling sorry misspelled thoughts. It's Mother Day night and unfortunatley my Mom is not with me she passed away at 52 of sudden heart failure. I do think her smoking habit and diet pills had something to do with this. Wow I can't believe I'm sharing this I actually I cant spell that am pretty drunk it's ok here we go. I started rinning at 40 gave up cigs and did pretty good I ran a 25.43 5K which got me a 2nd age group win. Since then i'VE HAD MIKED REVIEWS sorry about caps I'm bombed! oops./.....I just ran a 28.32 5k honestly what happended why don't I push myslelf ? I don't know can't answer I thinkk I could be better but haven't shown that .Hhmm I know better I know what to do I need to be acountable not sure if I can .................I will let you know either way it's the right thing to do . I do love to see all the great thing syou guys accomplish withe hard work and dedication , I feel very ashamed because I know theres a lot of potential we will see I can't promise I won't lie ......................

Well I can tell I know how you feel my dad was killed when I was 15 2 weeks before Christmas. So I'm sure mothers day is tough for like Christmas and father day is for me!

I went off the straight and narrow when in colleges after giving up an athletic scholarship and things really didn't get better for me until I was 34. That was when I decided to run again and leave my habits behind and use running not only to honor myself but my father also!

So for me it's about pushing myself and living life to the fullest while I can! So don't regret how you feel today use today as the springboard to the future and either use running or whatever else gives you joy in honoring yourself and mom!

Hang in there life gets better you just have to remember:

"Once in awhile you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right" Jerry Garcia

Mother's Day stinks for a lot of reasons for a lot of us (and other holidays, why do so many losses occur around holidays?). But yes if you want to train for something and push yourself you can always get your training blog or just your week in training posted here. Pick a good late summer or fall race and find a good program and try to stick with it would be one idea.

Amy, for each and every person here, running anywhere close to our personal capabilities requires a lot of time, time that we also devote to our lives, our jobs, our sons or daughters, our husbands or wives, our homes, our friends. It's no crime to run for enjoyment, to spend time with friends, to help out local causes.

I don't run to prove anything to anyone but myself, and I never imagined in a million years when I started five years ago that I would still have anything in the tank. Yes, when I race, I want to run as well as my level of fitness will allow me. As long as I execute my plan reasonably well, where I finish/place is more a factor of who shows up that day.

Take some pressure off of yourself. Train as your life allows, race as your training allows, and smell the flowers along the way.

How's your head this morning, BTW?

Amy - Thanks for opening up and sharing. Means a lot to me and I am sure others who can relate in someway or another. It's "running" nothing more nothing less. Whatever you decide to make it is your choice but at the end of the day when it is time to leave our bodies our soul is not going to think twice about how fast we ran or how far. It will ask one question and one question only.... Did I do my best to be loving! and even if you didn't you have already been forgiven before you have asked.

So, run your ass off, or don't. But, for heavens sake love the run!

Menudo.

Amy, I would predict that you're already further along than your mom. In addition to the things parent teach us to do, parents also show us what not to do. You got that. Holler, if you need something.

Oz is right. You have made changes that put you ahead of the game, no matter how fast you are running.

First of all, I think you should be applauded and not ashamed as it sounds like you have made a number of important lifestyle changes in the past years that have impacted your life in a positive way. What many people do not realize is that lifestyle choices have much more of an impact on how we age, more so than our genetics! Quitting smoking and creating a more active lifestyle are HUGE changes.

My nine year old and I just completed her first Girls on the Run 5K last Saturday. I'll be honest, I never once told her she should sign up for the program. The only thing I told her when I found out she had interest in doing it, was that if she signed up she needed to finish the program. I honestly don't care if she runs another race in her life. I think she will, but that's beside the point. If all she learned was that getting out and moving is one part of a healthy lifestyle, then I consider that a success.

As far as wanting to improve on your times and not seeing that, that is a normal part of the ups and downs of life and racing. I would encourage you to sit down at some point in the future, analyze your goals not only in racing but in life and try to brainstorm what things are truly important to you. Then make your decisions based on that.

Don't get too discouraged. Even when we are reminded of tragedy in our lives, the fact remains that we have the choice to either just go through the tough times or grow from and as a result of them. It is simply our choice.

Hope you're feeling better this morning.

Thanks for feeling secure enough to share these thoughts with us. It takes a lot of courage to lay yourself bare.

You've taken some big steps in the past few years, but you're allowing those huge, awesome life-changing decisions you made to be obscured by self-doubt about something as ultimately trivial as how fast you're racing. Here's where the hard work and dedication is most needed: Don't let your insecurities run your life. Running should be a positive influence and thing of joy and fun, not a source of torment or a reinforcement for feelings of inadequacy.

If you allow running to be twisted into an exercise in "I'm not good enough" or "Why can they do it but not I?" you will either push yourself into injury or push yourself right out of running. That would be unfortunate, and given your family history, probably not wise.

So don't worry so much about great racing times. Concentrate instead about the good times you have while running. Just run. It's enough.

I'm just here to send you a virtual hug.

We should all go to a race, then start drinking after, then start talking, then we will see this is not a running club, but a supporting group.

Jerry wrote:We should all go to a race, then start drinking after, then start talking, then we will see this is not a running club, but a supporting group.

Shockingly well said!

ounce wrote:

Jerry wrote:We should all go to a race, then start drinking after, then start talking, then we will see this is not a running club, but a supporting group.

Shockingly well said!

Conversations had long ago was that blog traffic on the HH Boards was much higher when training wasn't going well than when everything was going great. That support is an important element of the community created.

But, sometimes we need to be "told like it is," too, and I wonder if we do that enough, for fear of reprisal?

Martin VW wrote:

But, sometimes we need to be "told like it is," too, and I wonder if we do that enough, for fear of reprisal?

It seems like in any community whether it's a real running group you go to or a forum running or not, there are a few people who don't mind telling it like it is at the risk of people not liking them and there are others who will always say the "nice" thing.